Teri Gender Bender new EP: 'OUTSIDERS'
Teri Gender Bender’s new EP OUTSIDERS feels to me to be a story of emotional turmoil in the outgrowing of a relationship, and in the development past a life of succumbing to constructed pressures.
In the first track, “You Won The Man”, Teri plays upbeat acoustic guitar, accompanied by a tambourine. She battles with expectations – “that was your mother’s plan…you made her happy, you got the man” while being entrapped within her mother’s ideas of life and is not yet living for herself. The idea of the mother is perhaps both a symbol of a parental figure, and a metaphorical societal ‘Mother’.
Teri describes, “amidst the vast emptiness of societal constructs, we, the outsiders, wander like a lone star in a desolate sky. In the face of existential insignificance, we embrace the beauty of isolation, for it is in the depths of detachment that we discover the truest self.”
“You Won The Man” is the beginning of her journey to becoming an ‘outsider’. She still tries to conform to such societal constructs, but experiences clear confliction between the desires of a society, and her own wishes.
The repetition of the song’s title throughout appears to be an attempt to convince both herself and the listener of her contentment with her situation. Teri’s voice is strained in parts; a pointer towards her desire to break out. She paints an image of a suburban, homely life, and the pressing feeling of wishing for something more.
This feeling of wishing bursts into emotion in “Stupid Love Song”, and Teri’s lyricism is beautiful in its simplicity: she sings “the kiss is suspended in the air, it waits for us…I am here to lay myself before you”. Focus is brought to these lyrics through extended pausing in the notes of the bassline. She creates a strong idea of aching and longing, amplified by the clashing notes of the introduction, and her vocalisations that sound almost like cries.
In “Sideways” and “What Do You Want Me To Do”, the lyrics project a scene of conflict between two partners. “Sideways” is filled with resentment, and the quickening drum beat mimics a building of rage. Teri’s criticisms of her partner escalate into the blunt and powerful accusation, the guitar mirroring the melody along with her.
This, coupled with the sarcastic use and mocking repetition of pet names - honey, bunny, baby - show an outright exhaustion with a relationship and a life that no longer fits her. Teri throws away the mediocre, self-congratulatory ideas of societal and relationship-based constructs, and refuses to settle.
The final track, “Walk Into My Everything”, has a slower and calmer feel than the former tracks – a new stress on high piano tones introducing this softness. It has an air of acceptance – acceptance of the end of a relationship, and of Teri’s decision to subvert society and claim a new position.
She sings, “I used to feel no sympathy”, harking back to the anger of the previous two songs. This is perhaps a demonstration of her gaining an understanding of the constructs that influence the actions of those that exist beneath it, and allowing herself to feel for the people who may have hurt her due to these pressures. It’s a fitting end to OUTSIDERS, in that she now realises she has become one. But, this is not primarily a painful realisation, as she has the ability to fully explore her sense of self and allow others to see this part of her. In regard to the track, Teri states, “we defy the void by embracing the ephemeral connections we forge.”
Through her pain, she has obtained openness and understanding. She has confronted the isolation that society teaches us to fear.
Stream OUTSIDERS by Teri Gender Bender and catch her supporting The Mars Volta on their US tour this September/October.
